


it's hell on earth and the city's on fire (inhale, in hell there's heaven)

by wclfstcr



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, End of the World, F/M, Giving Up, Hurt, I Made Myself Cry, M/M, Mentions of past child abuse, Sad, first wizarding war, hurt and angst, like angst, the only time you'll see me write peter pettigrew like this, this is hella depressing, this made me sad, uh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-21
Updated: 2019-05-21
Packaged: 2020-03-09 05:03:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18910111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wclfstcr/pseuds/wclfstcr
Summary: the world was ending, and sirius was calm.





	it's hell on earth and the city's on fire (inhale, in hell there's heaven)

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The End](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17864663) by [confundedgryffindor](https://archiveofourown.org/users/confundedgryffindor/pseuds/confundedgryffindor). 



> (renamed) title is from the song solo by frank ocean

_there will come soft rains and the smell of ground,_

_and swallows circling with their shimmering sound;_

 

the world was ending, and sirius was calm.

 

screaming, curses and shrieks of terror and mania left him unperturbed, unbothered as if they were a regular occurrence that had formed itself into mundanity in his life. if you really do think about, it had.

 

_and frogs in the pool singing at night,_

_and wild plum trees in the tremulous night;_

 

he was staring up at the dark mark looming over the potter's house, the same emerald green that adorned the family tapestry in the most ancient and noble house of black, but no, not a house anymore, merely a pile of rubble and debris, laughter and joy and love still vibrating off of the remains of an altar, one of which was the most holiest and grandest of all.

 

_robins will wear their feathery fire,_

_whistling their whims on a low fence-wire;_

 

they were surrounded by fire, licking its dirty lips an inch near them every second passing, the sky was collapsing, threatening to crush them under its magnificent glory and the stars were dying - _the_ star was dying. _they_ were dying.

 

he was now embracing remus, his remus, trying to shield him away from this absolute nonsense. the full moon was near, just a week away, and moony needed his rest, or else he'd get cranky, and oh, they _really_ should be going and they'll meet james and lily and little, ickle, harrykins soon, yes? and maybe they'll meet peter, too, and when they do, maybe sirius would kill him, hiss out _avada kedavra_ , so easy, so swift, just like his father had demonstrated, or maybe he'd whisper _crucio_ , so exhilarating, so familiar, just like his mother would practice on him, and would they be meeting again at diagon alley for drinks this saturday, wormy?

 

the world was ending, and sirius wasn't calm, but terrified.

 

_and no one will know of the war, not one_

 

it had ended too soon, this labyrinth of a life. baby harry had just learnt how to crawl, he had started calling sirius _pawoof_ which made sirius' heart swell and remus smile. james and lily were so in love, in love with each other, their child, and the world, even if sirius insisted the world was not something to love, they still loved it anyway.

 

and he was in love too, _what a hypocrite_. he hadn't understood what james and lily were always on about, but now that he finally had remus, he knew.

 

_will care at last when it is done._

 

ages. they had spent ages together, but it was all still new. and he wasn't ready to lose it yet. he wasn't ready to lose _remus_ yet. and the life he had meticulously and prudently built for the two of them, and sirius would remember what he would say to all those girls back at hogwarts, when he was shining the brightest, _'but, love, it just wasn't meant to be.'_ and perhaps, it really wasn't.

 

sirius was now staring at james, his brother in all but blood, clutching lily, who sirius insisted was _the only woman for me, ever, evans,_ and harry, little, tiny, prongslet, whom sirius had come to love so fiercely, ready to lay his life down for the sprog, so tightly that his bronze knucles had turned white and his eyes were squeezed shut as if he could block the murderous roars, getting louder and louder -

 

the world was ending, and sirius was crying.

 

_no one would mind, neither bird nor tree,_

 

gasping, his arms scrabbling. reaching out to remus, wheeping. his body wrecked with heavy sobs, he tried to find sanctuary in remus' warmth, but the cold was too cruel, thwarting his blood.

 

and remus was crying, too. "sirius," he kept whispering. little, tiny, baby harry was screaming, his pudgy face red, and for the first time, none of them paid any heed, except for james' arms tightening more around him.

 

"remus," he desperately tried to block out everything around him, just like remus had taught him back in fifth year, when they were the highest in the night sky. "remus," his was voice was cracking, words faltering with fear, anger and _betrayal_. "i love you i love you i love you -"

 

remus was kissing him, hard and soft, just like the first time they kissed, underneath the vastness of the starry night, the bonfire warm and soothing. _oh, how life plays its games._

 

the world was ending, and sirius couldn't stop shaking.

 

instead, he was pressing _his family_ against his own self, gritting words out through his tears and faltering speech. "i love you all so much, so much."

and they tried to choke back tears, dried lips and empty stomachs, melancholic eyes and lifeless smiles, "i love you, guys, too. all of you."

and tiny harry had started to cry again, as if sensing he won't be getting his hogwarts letter. "it will all be over soon. soon enough. shh, prongslet," sirius cooed, resting his forehead against harry's, not noticing how his action had created another ocean of tears in james' eyes. "hush, now, my lovely. it won't hurt, not at all. it'll be quicker and easier than falling asleep."

 

_if mankind perished utterly;_

 

the world was ending, and it was getting louder.

 

death was upon them. stalking. waiting for the perfect moment to strike.

 

it was agony and sirius wanted it to be over.

 

"i love you, i love you, remus, remus, i love you, moony, i love you so much -"

 

_and spring herself, when she woke at dawn_

 

"-they're here, they're here. it's over, it's all over. hold on to me, don't let go of me, moony. please, don't let go of me. i love you, moony, moony, i love you, remus -"

 

the world was ending, and with a final, grand bellow of _avada kedavra!_ piercing the stiff air, when sky gave out to the tremulous night, when the moon succumbed to the darkness, when all the stars burned out, when _the_ star burned out, sirius finally dropped dead.

 

_would scarcely know that we were gone._

**Author's Note:**

> the poem i've used is called there will come soft rains by sara teasdale which u can read [here](https://poets.org/poem/there-will-come-soft-rains)
> 
> this was Heavily inspired by confundedgryffindor pls dont sue me op
> 
> 1 kudo & 1 comment = 1 prayer


End file.
